mintstermonsters:

queeneclipsa:

beelzebitch:

blowjobhorseman:

blowjobhorseman:

blowjobhorseman:

I know this isn’t Bojack related, but recently instead of turning men down by saying “no, thank you”, I experimented with saying “I’m engaged” and flashing a ring instead.
Needless to say, I am not engaged. It still worked better than just saying “no”, but then came questions like “so where is your fiancé?” and “he let you go out by yourself looking like that?” or just remaining persistent in asking for my number.
So I went into my closet, and pulled out a fiancé.
Now when I turn men down and they need further proof, they can know that I would rather lug around a 5 foot tall plastic skeleton to Steak n Shake and fake a proposal than give them my number.

His name is Braunschweiger Last-Name and I think I’m going to take his last name.

Update: the wedding was beautiful

The level of dedication this took is monumental and enviable and if I cared about anything this much I would be much farther in life

@whatwouldwaltdo

This is absolutely fantastic. My goodness.